Now, Red, please could you take this basket of food to your poor sick grandmama while I do the chores, you know where she lives, be sure to stay with her for a while to make her feel better!
Once Upon a time on a fine, fine morning after breakfast red's mother asked her to go to grandmama's house and bring her lunch.
Ok Mama!
Little red riding hood and her dog scared the birds and chased the squrriels as happily as a little girl can ever be. But she didn't notice a wolf lurking in the shadows
Hey! come down you birds
Woof!
Ha Ha Ha Ha
Little Girl, little girl tell me, where are you going?
I am going to my grandma's quaint house in the forest clearing to bring her lunch cause she is sick. And I'm not afraid of you, little silly wolfie, cause I'm a mischievous little girl.
Suddenly, the wolf leaped in front of red and stopped her
Now, tell me, where is your grandma's house?
Of course, wolf was NOT happy to be called "little silly wolfie" by somewhat little girl, he snorted, but managed to keep his fake smile.
Well, you walk down the road in south-east, then you turn right twice and left once
As soon as I got the directions, I'll bolt to it and reach it before this little girl. I'll eat her grandma, pretend that I am her grandma when she got there, then I'll eat her too! PERFECT!
The wolf started to run as fast as he could towards grandma's house. But, you see, he and drunken a liter of apple cider not long ago and his brain was fuzzy. So he went all south-west (thinking he had gone the right way), while red went all the way south-east.
Ha Ha! Here I come!
South-east (the right way)
So, a little while later, while little red riding hood and her grandmama were happily crunching on snacks and having a chat, wolf was being roasted with carrots and potatos by the three pet bears of Goldilocks! The End!