Chester A Arthur
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- CHESTER ARTHUR'S MIDNIGHT STROLLby Kevin Perry
- Chester Arthur
- Yes Mr. President sir? How can I be of assistance to you?
- Winston
- I fancy my daily midnight stroll, my good sir. Prepare the garden for a moonlit walk!
- Congressman Harrington
- Judge Thornton
- Ah, these mutton chop side burns truly make me look like a president! No wonder everyone refers to me as "Gentleman Boss"!
- You know, fashion is an art. One must change clothes with the changing occasions! I have over 80 pairs of pants in my wardrobe!
- Now I wonder who that is I hear off in the distance...
- It's getting quite late...OH, WINSTON!
- Of course!
- THIS DAMN PENDLETON ACT! As a congressman of the Legislative branch, I feel as though my power is being challenged and threatened!!!
- Oh, why of course!
- Gentlemen!! Mr. Harrington, Judge Thornton. Change is necessary! We cannot keep relying on favoritism for government jobs. Too many government positions are given to people based on who they know rather than their qualifications. Let merit prevail!!!
- ...
- ...
- I must admit, this new merit-based system might be a good thing. The Spoils System is corrupt in that it promotes the idea of who you know and not what you know.
- What nonsense is this, Mr. President?! The Spoils System worked just fine for years! Merit-based? This is all just some big plan of yours to take away our power and bring in outsiders!
- Congressman Harrington, I get your concerns, however, the Spoils System is problematic and not fair. You will need to find new ways to stay relevant politically or you may be out of a job very soon.
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