Conversation Storyboard
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- Every year at my evaluation, my boss gives me tasks that are completely unrelated to what I am working on. I rarely say anything directly, feeling like I can't believe that he is so disconnected to what I do.
- It makes me so angry every year that he does this. I never speak up and prefer to blame him for not seeing me. This seems to get at the "what happened" types conversation. In my head I disagree with what happened. It is clear that I am making an assumption and instead of asking why those tasks were chosen and how they could contribute to my development, I get resentful and tuck the evaluation away for another year.
- To free myself from this cycle of not feeling seen, resentful, and silent, I need to think about why the conversation bothers me and how I can approach it as a learning situation. While I may have feelings about this (frustrated or confused) looking at the conversation from a learning stance might help me feel more connected to my internal thoughts. When in these situations, I freeze and just want to get out of there. I am learning that this is my flight or fight reaction because of some perceived threat. The biggest threat has been to my relationship with this person who does have a lot to offer and to my sense of self worth. Instead of having an awkward conversation I preferred to stay stuck. This wasn't good for me or for our leadership team.
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