graphic memoir part three
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- Hello! Yes, I would like to schedule an appointment with Dr. O'Laughlin, please. As soon as possible.
- Mom
- Okay, well, that's not really how that works...Anyway, as you can see, people are already lining up to cast their ballots early.
- I won't lose! If I lose it's because the election was rigged!
- Even as the conditions in the world worsened, I felt strangely freer than before. I wasn't alone; I wasn't going insane. Just the fact that there was a solution coming kept me sane. I hummed to myself for the first time in weeks.
- *blah**insults**literal garbage*
- a
- crap.
- My mom and I agreed that medication was a good next step. Unfortunately, that meant I had to make a call, which gives me intense anxiety - I cried when I hung up.
- What if everything goes wrong? What if you kill your family by accident? What if Trump wins the election? What if women never have equal rights? What if everything goes wrong? What if I'm not a good person? What if everything goes wrong? What if you kill your family? What if Trump wins the election? What if women never have equal rights? What if everything goes wrong? What if I'm not a good person? What if everything goes wrong? What if you kill your family? What if Trump wins the election? What if women never have equal rights? What if everything goes wrong? What if I'm not a good person? What if everything goes wrong? What if you kill your family? What if Trump wins the election? What if women never have equal rights? What if everything goes wrong? What if I'm not a good person? What if everything goes wrong? What if you kill your family? What if Trump wins the election? What if women never have equal rights? What if everything goes wrong? What if I'm not a good person? What if everything goes wrong? What if you kill your family? What if Trump wins the election? What if women never have equal rights? What if everything goes wrong? What if I'm not a good person? What if everything goes wrong? What if you kill your family? What if Trump wins the election? What if women never have equal rights? What if everything goes wrong?
- *sigh*This isn't going to be good...
- I got an appointment scheduled for December 8th, a significantly long time from when I made the call. The thought that there was something good coming powered me through the hellscape of 2020. As my mind clung to the idea of relief, the world outside devolved.
- THIS IS BAD. I knew it was going to be bad. This is really bad. EVERYTHING HURTS. My eyes are sore. Why am I like this? I hope things get better soon. Does Hayden want to break up with me? I wonder what his life would be like without me. What if I accidentally die? THIS IS BAD. I knew it was going to be bad. This is really bad. EVERYTHING HURTS. My eyes are sore. Why am I like this? I hope things get better soon. Does Hayden want to break up with me? I wonder what his life would be like without me. What if I accidentally die? THIS IS BAD. I knew it was going to be bad. This is really bad. EVERYTHING HURTS. My eyes are sore. Why am I like this? I hope things get better soon. Does Hayden want to break up with me? I wonder what his life would be like without me. What if I accidentally die? THIS IS BAD. I knew it was going to be bad. This is really bad. EVERYTHING HURTS. My eyes are sore. Why am I like this? I hope things get better soon. Does Hayden want to break up with me? I wonder what his life would be like without me. What if I accidentally die? THIS IS BAD. I knew it was going to be bad. This is really bad. EVERYTHING HURTS. My eyes are sore. Why am I like this? I hope things get better soon. Does Hayden want to break up with me? I wonder what his life would be like without me.
- Wes - look at me! Everything is going to be okay. I know you don't feel good right now, but a solution is coming. Everything is going to be okay. Trust me.
- Since all sports were cancelled or postponed, more emphasis was put on the oncoming election than ever. This was my main focus as I awaited my doctor's appointment. The one highlight was the first female vice president ever.
- Kamala Harris
- As I continually researched PMDD and the different symptoms, my hopefulness started to give way to panic. I still had a while to go before I could even have access to medication, and I was dangerously near the week of misery that I had grown to dread.
- Things got dark in my head. The anxieties I had continually suppressed over the last month washed over me wave after wave, pushing me into thinking about everything I could've done differently. My mind and body ached from being so tense all the time, and I started the cycle of shutting myself away from Hayden, my friends, and my family.
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